Moloch

Winter's singularity
Into which all days and thoughts slip languidly
like snowflakes through a rich
streetlight glow or onto the
tip of your tongue
Through time and the ringing
of spoon against spode
Warm teacups of thought
brought gently up to your lips
Holy hours suffused with song
and celebration; filled with that
amber stasis and deep, blissful
comfort of your soft cheek.

Moloch

Someone critique this, then.

And not just some "Yeah this has words and gives me good vibes" kind of crap.

I'll likely try something on Jayar's Dick Diary and Gretal's bit later.

Seriously, though. This is a challenge.

Contribute or GTFO.

Leigh-Cheri

Yeah, this has words and gives me good vibes.

Moloch

That comma saved you.

Better yet, don't confuse posting another poem with a critique.

lotus.

I'm flattered.

__________________

I don't know where the sunbeams end
And the starlights begin
It's all a mystery

J A G

How so?

EDIT: Unban Moloch

lotus.

Agreed.

__________________

I don't know where the sunbeams end
And the starlights begin
It's all a mystery

J A G

I believe it had a lot to do with this thread.

http://toolnavy.com/showthread.php?p...02#post2657902

ColdLogic

I don't think he behaved badly in that thread.

__________________
^ live one

J A G

I don't disagree.

infinitee

that dude could be sort of a dick, though.

but, when credit was due, he did give it to you.

__________________
"You are, and shall be, set in obsidian obelisk.
Those scars, these memories, will see you through"

J A G

Chef Ramsey is a dick too, but he brings out the best in people.

infinitee

Exactly

__________________
"You are, and shall be, set in obsidian obelisk.
Those scars, these memories, will see you through"

lotus.

I can make great risotto.

__________________

I don't know where the sunbeams end
And the starlights begin
It's all a mystery

gretal

dicks are for assholes

J A G

i don't know what you and your buddies do for fun, but you guys party way too fucking hard for me.

gretal

you party limp?

J A G

i party fast, i swing limp, and i work hard.

gretal

alright, thank you

infinitee

i lold at that

__________________
"You are, and shall be, set in obsidian obelisk.
Those scars, these memories, will see you through"

crincled

unban moloch under the condition he does something about his permanent male PMS

tweety pie

i have a feeling at least two people in this thread are moloch so it's ok

infinitee

who?

__________________
"You are, and shall be, set in obsidian obelisk.
Those scars, these memories, will see you through"

tweety pie

idk, i just wanted a bit of attention

J A G

i like your fancy custom title.

tweety pie

i like your boobs

crincled

hmm