this is my most obvious piece that was inspired by tool ie alot of familar lines in this. ;) just thought i would share. i hope there isn't some kind of copyright garb that i am violating with using a few of these lines. oh well. enjoy.
exxxploding souls.
we were there
we were already there…
and waiting
i opened my eye and there we were
standing there
shrouded with rays from the silver sun
staring wildly into each others eyes
the mystical aura flying around our naked bodies
like a tornado
we are the core
calm
right in the middle of this ocean of chaos
time congeals around us
conceals us
with lucid vanadium steel
~~~{~we~}~~~
~~{~stand~}~~
~{~quivering~}~
at the pinnacle
of every emotion
we could ever feel
bodies at a stand still
while our minds intertwine
and forsake the time-line
i know
you know
i know
you know
so let go...
let go...
just let
fuckin’
go.......
__________________ The Sun is Getting Dim, Will We Pay for Who We've Been?
Fuck. That's the best poem I ever read. (not that I've read many, but still...) That's fucking brilliant. I don't know why, but that really (I dunno, i originally had 'moved' here, but that's not right )
e, a lot. Again, I don't know why, but it reminds me of disposition. I'm gonna check your site now, hope it keeps up to the high standard you've set. Keep up the good work raiSINgirl420
__________________ serve yourself no one else can do for you like you no one else fails like me
in my eyes i burn alive fly like a bird no more words just you and i high in the sky
nerdlover of blacktulip
Wow, that's some good stuff. I really liked the destruction of minds, off with my head?, yeah my head is a little off, and One flew east, one flew west and i flew. And from one of the others that i can't remember now, the bit 'divine entered our vocabulary, and we feasted on it'.
Just wondering, I cut and pasted my favourite poems into a text file, can I keep them on my computer, or is there laws against that, or do you not want me to do that, whatever. Just want to make sure I'm not doing something wrong. Anyway, loved your work, I reckon I might get into some poetry, I'm not real creative (I just started playing guitar, I calnplay Eon Blue Apocalypse, some of lateralus and 3 libras... yay! That's the extent of my creative talents) but what have I got to lose. Thanks heaps for posting this, and I don't think theres anything wrong with being insane.
__________________ serve yourself no one else can do for you like you no one else fails like me
in my eyes i burn alive fly like a bird no more words just you and i high in the sky
nerdlover of blacktulip
i agree with jebus, except i'd like to be a little less fawning. i read some of your other poetry and...fantastic is the word i would use to describe it, except it doesn't really...aah, hell, i'm fawning. i would advise you to continue writing poetry, though you didn't ask for my advice. i enjoyed the workshoppe piece involving scissors very much. it made me feel warm and starkly human for a while. thank you.
Originally posted by Jebus Just wondering, I cut and pasted my favourite poems into a text file, can I keep them on my computer, or is there laws against that, or do you not want me to do that, whatever. Just want to make sure I'm not doing something wrong.
copy, paste, accredit. copy, paste, accredit. seriously you can keep whatever one you like, paste them all over your town for all i care...maybe i will do that one day... smother this college town i live in...in my words...it would be fun.
damnables post on the main page of the forum reminded me of a quote from 'waking life.'
"all theory and no action." thats me, i need to grow some balls. ha.
but yeah...you can keep any piece you liked, or that moved you...just accredit me, i had a little bout with plagiarism on the net a few months ago...it wasn't fun.
and as far as creativity goes....anyone can be...just let your mind go... if it is writing... writewritewrite...
and the guitar...master it. it is possible. play your own music. make up your own stuff...
thanks. for awhile there weren't any replies to this thread and i was like...well... i must suck. hehe... no, kidding, i write to stay the least bit sane....and it doesn't really matter how it is taken.
check back at the site often...i add all the time, like i said i have soooooo much...that i don't even know where to start. ha. thanks again...this post became long winded...it's just i take writing seriously. well sometimes not...but hell...i love it. ha. later.
__________________ The Sun is Getting Dim, Will We Pay for Who We've Been?
Cheers. Yeah, I don't think I'll be spreading your stuff anywhere or showing it to friends, it's just for me. If you get around to updating your site, if you could post something about it so I know you have, I'd greatly appreciate it.
__________________ serve yourself no one else can do for you like you no one else fails like me
in my eyes i burn alive fly like a bird no more words just you and i high in the sky
nerdlover of blacktulip
