I think this song is about old people and growing older. In the beginning of the song I believe I heard mention of watching re-runs of X-files, and old people really love that show. I'll pull out some more lyrical quotes and explain the connection to you guys.

"Can't breathe right now."

Basically, old people are one step closer to not being able to breathe at all.

"You believe me don’t you?
Please believe what I just said."

No one ever listens to old people. I can't remember one time when they weren't harping on about the good ol' days and talking about nonsensical things that never happened, while watching X-files, in their small and cluttered room in Happy Acres Retirement Homes, all the while they were pleading with me to listen.

"Strapped down in my bed.
Feet cold and eyes red.
I’m out of my head.
Am I alive, Am I dead ?
Can’t remember what they said.
Goddamn shit the bed."

Old people are so fucking stupid and medicated that they can't remember shit and crap themselves all the time. This one was a give me. Strapped down in my bed is referring to how they're all loonies and you might as well call a retirement home an asylum. Gotta love euphemisms.

"But I forgot my pen.
Shit, the bed again. Typical."

Pretty much going along the same vein. When they aren't shitting themselves they're forgotting where they leave things. This time, we know it's a typical thing.

"Sunkist and Sudafed."

Mmm...delicious! Pretty much the highlight of any given day for an old person. When they aren't looking forward to dying, they're choking back some tasty Sunkist mixed with Sudafed. Sudafed causes a number of problems with elderly individuals which Maynard is obviously picking up on.

http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic/sudafed_wcp.htm

Use in Elderly: The elderly (60 years and older) are more likely to have adverse reactions to sympathomimetics. Overdosage of sympathomimetics in the elderly may cause hallucinations, convulsions, CNS depression, and death. Safe use of a short-acting sympathomimetic should be demonstrated in the individual elderly patient before considering the use of a sustained-action formulation.

If hallucinations and death is the worst it can offer, the CNS depression it could add can't be much worse than the depression they already feel of people revolting at the smell of their shitty asses.

"Can’t remember what they said.
Goddamn, shit the bed."

Pretty much the same as above. You can't stress this enough here folks.

"Goddamn, shit the bed!"

FOCK! And with that, I'd suggest some Depends brand diapers.

Probably not.

rosetta stoned is a tribute to how the band can make a fart joke of a song, and their fans will call it amazing. True story.

*shakes head*

its not as bad as the pot, ill give you that.

Quoted for truthiness.

You guys are ruining my interpretation of this deep song that means a lot to me.

I find that rather disrespectful.

It's a joke, thats what it is.
But it's the best song so far in my first listen of the album...though wings part 1 was sweeeeeet.

Old people don't watch the X files. Only a 13 year old kid who made that post would call 21 year old's who watch X-files DVDS old. Real old people are approximately 40 years older than those who watch the X-files. :-)

Yea, the X-files is a really good show, especially when you're trippin' balls on Sudafed. Nice try grandpa, I'm wise to your age.

Do you really believe that Tool has that much animosity towards their fans? If so, why bother listening to them at all?

Old people watch the X-Files?

Yep. Old people or out of shape, pasty faced nerds who don't get laid.

In retrospect, they're the same thing, in that they both crap themselves.

do some acid
see if you feel the same way after

Fucking Hilarious. This is my signature. Most lol's in a long time.

Ive got most of they lyrics now and it looks like the song is about a guy who had an alien encounter outside area 51, they took him and showed him how humanity would end but he didn't write it down and can't remember it now.

Why do people insist on analyzing Tool songs on their own. They are part of a bigger albums you know.

Even when Tool gives us literal songs, people still read way too much into them.