Bird in The Rain

On the morning of gray October day
A light rain began to fall
I stepped outside
To smell the rain
A lonely bird was perched
In a nearby tree
I looked at the bird
As the bird looked at me
I felt his sorrow and wondered
Will he be there tomorrow?
As the day went on
The rain fell much harder
So much that
The boats could not leave the harbor
The storm was here to stay
Then the very next day
That bird had not budged
As the rain continued to fall
Had he lost his mate?
What will be his fate?
A week goes by
For the bird did not fly
He was all alone
In the rain
I brought him some bread
I offered some cheese
Nothing would suffice
He just would not eat
Two weeks had passed
How long would this last?
The rain would not let up
Three weeks
Then four
For the rain
It did pour
The bird was looking like
Death was knocking on his door
There was nothing that I could do
Tears ran down my face
As puddles filled up this place
At five weeks in
I went to save the bird
But it was too late
His body was frozen to the limb
Rigor mortis had set in
As the rain continued to fall

Originally Posted by lotus. Bird in The Rain On the morning of gray October day A light rain began to fall I stepped outside To smell the rain A lonely bird was perched In a nearby tree I looked at the bird As the bird looked at me I felt his sorrow and wondered Will he be there tomorrow? As the day went on The rain fell much harder So much that The boats could not leave the harbor The storm was here to stay Then the very next day That bird had not budged As the rain continued to fall Had he lost his mate? What will be his fate? A week goes by For the bird did not fly He was all alone In the rain I brought him some bread I offered some cheese Nothing would suffice He just would not eat Two weeks had passed How long would this last? The rain would not let up Three weeks Then four For the rain It did pour The bird was looking like Death was knocking on his door There was nothing that I could do Tears ran down my face As puddles filled up this place At five weeks in I went to save the bird But it was too late His body was frozen to the limb Rigor mortis had set in As the rain continued to fall

Originally Posted by x7 Lateralus 7x Gorgeous how this illustrates the helplessness of a situation when the person or thing you are trying to help doesn't have the will to accept it. Or is just too stuck in the reality of the situation to take a step back and work out the options, every storm passes by analogy but the storms to come can create a self-defeating mentality. What's the point sorta internal dialogue. Other than that the best illustration of the intensity of the rain was when you described how ships couldn't leave the harbor, that was a good comparison to sort of set a scale of intensity. There's very little I would personally change about it if it were mine, but it still reads good.