I lay my head back and let myself fall into the depths
sinking far far away from the surface
a moist abyss with a clarity of light that only pure darkness can allow.
color so pure and manifest that
all you feel is wonder and awe.
how can something like this be
the sight, the sense of it
ever so subtle
yet pouring heavy into
a tunneled core that fills me up
some siphoning force
cognizant of what truth lies external to it
pulling in exactly what it needs
some inner turbid jet stream
tensing with hydraulic force
tears well up and overflow
something so transient and imperfect
something so tractionless and fleeting
to live and die
before the close of an eye
an attraction momentarily realized
yet forever felt
skimming past like two magnets
feeling the pull
yet choked by the past’s gravity
incapable of contact
compartmentalized by the thinnest
layer of particles
Unable to feel
i see your sadness and your inability to
split me open
or the lack of knowing how to open yourself.
i want to eat you
i want to consume this moment, burn it for fuel and emanate its remnants from my own being
yea Carp I see that. Looking back now I feel similar.
Sometimes I get in a weird head space or feeling that is so fleeting and foreign that little writings like this come out. . . and, in the moment, it all means so much, precisely so much. . . .and then, going back and reading it later. . . I completely forget the visions that birthed the specific words.
found this piece in an old phone that I rebooted. I have a hint in mind of where I was emotionally when I wrote this. . .but . . . beyond that whiff of suspicion. . the last stanza is lost upon me as well. :)
before I posted it, i began to refine it and rewrite it. . . but then I felt like i was tainting it. . so I just posted the original.