"an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other"

[Lysander]

I've seen this quotation referred to in the FAQ about H, but in that context it's not very helpful; I thought i'd transcribe the whole introduction here. This is from one of the most imfamous bootlegs in Tool history, the "December 1996 soundboard" which is actually an audience recording of the 11/23 show in Philidelphia. It's a fabulous recording, however; there is almost no crowd noise at all.

"So ah... any of you ever watch those Warner Brother cartoons? Sometimes there's that one where the guy's got a tough time makin' a decision? He's got an angel on one shoulder, devil on the other? Seems pretty obvious, right--usually the angels' the one that's gonna, give the good advice and the devil's tryin' to get him to do what's gonna be bad for him... it's not always that simple though... most times, they're like, not really angels or devils--they're just friends... giving you advice... Looking out for your best interests but not really... understanding what's gonna be best for you. So it kinda comes down to you, you have to make the decision yourself. This song's called H."

[Janos]

THANK YOU!

[Lysander]

You're welcome. :)

[guttersnipe]

I've heard him introduce the song simply as "this is a song about choices".

[Lysander]

I've also heard him say it's for his son, in another concert.

[JstCloseUrEyes]

I had a pretty (decent/good) interpretation of this song a while back...about how I felt that it was basically about a person/individual/maynard/anyone being somewhat torn apart by the feelings that they have for someone who has hurt them before, but that the subject can no quite let go of, and this person keeps draining from them but like said, the subject is torn...to leave, or to keep this 'toxic' person in their life
..


i think thats what my interpretation was...its been a really..really long time

but...it sort of fits in with the idea of the angel and the devil, as there is two options...or that this person influencing the subject could be both angel and devil... not seeming to harm the subject or not meaning to (angel), but the person actually harming the subject (the devil)

...i think that may almost make sense

[prescious lamb and martyr]

I've seen this quotation referred to in the FAQ about H, but in that context it's not very helpful; I thought i'd transcribe the whole introduction here. This is from one of the most imfamous bootlegs in Tool history, the "December 1996 soundboard" which is actually an audience recording of the 11/23 show in Philidelphia. It's a fabulous recording, however; there is almost no crowd noise at all.

"So ah... any of you ever watch those Warner Brother cartoons? Sometimes there's that one where the guy's got a tough time makin' a decision? He's got an angel on one shoulder, devil on the other? Seems pretty obvious, right--usually the angels' the one that's gonna, give the good advice and the devil's tryin' to get him to do what's gonna be bad for him... it's not always that simple though... most times, they're like, not really angels or devils--they're just friends... giving you advice... Looking out for your best interests but not really... understanding what's gonna be best for you. So it kinda comes down to you, you have to make the decision yourself. This song's called H."

Yes I have this bootleg!!

[prescious lamb and martyr]

"My Blood Before Me Begs Me Open up my Heart Again." I think this refers to him drawing blood from his vein, his addiction in his mind begging him to give into this way of life again. As sick as it may sound.

[prescious lamb and martyr]

"Considerately Killing Me" He's enjoying dying slowly and numb happily from using
" I am to connected to you to slip away, to fade away." He's addicted and cannot stop using.

[Lysander]

I suppose these are all valid interpretations so rather than slam down with my usual anvil of tolerance I'll just quietly put my 'best guess' here: Maynard's talking about how he has friends who are really trying ot help him but not really doing so because they're giving him contrary advice that just confuses him, because how can both of these people, whom I like and respect, disagree so completely? The snake--this is pretty obvious as yet another Christianity refference, the snake from the garden tempting Eave to eat from the fruit of the tree of knowledge. "Considerately killing me"--his friends are trying to help, to be considerate, but because they care about him so much and are hammering him with their conflicting viewpoints, it's killing him. To me, it's a song about choices, and the process of choosing between them.

[briadugg]

"My Blood Before Me Begs Me Open up my Heart Again." I think this refers to him drawing blood from his vein, his addiction in his mind begging him to give into this way of life again. As sick as it may sound.

I'm thinking he blood reference is his family, particularily his mother. The snake is his friends, his past dabbling in the dark arts. When you visit the lyrics to Jambi, H has a similar feel.

[Xicked]

"Considerately" can also mean "deliberately."

The snake could be looked at in two different ways: Either an evil tempter or a guide helping to trigger an awakening. When the snake tempted Eve with the apple, sure they got cast out of the garden of Eden, but they were also awakened with a new awareness about the free will that they posessed.

Maybe the song was written through the viewpoint of an aspect of Maynard's personality. Maybe an ego, or a part of him that he is struggling to control. It is a part of him that he takes comfort in, but that he knows is toxic. It drags him down. His blood before him (his mother?) begs him to open his heart, to get back on a certain path. In "Wings" so many of the lyrics indicate to me that she had a large role in helping Maynard find himself spiritually.

"Considerately killing me" might refer only to the death of this particular ego. It is considerate as in kind AND as in deliberate because he wants to be rid of it. It could also refer to the deliberate way in which his coddling of this ego is killing himself in a way. "Drains me, bleeds me, leaves me cracked and empty, drags me down like some sweet gravity."

"I am too connected to you to
Slip away, to fade away.
Days away I still feel you
Touching me, changing me,
And considerately killing me."

I think the above verse refers to both sides. Both the particular ego and the "angel" trying to help him (could be an outside person or his higher self - I'm leaning toward the latter). He is connected to both; He doesn't want to lose either one.

The path to self-discovery can be a very long, tedious path with many hurdles and setbacks. It is easy to lose faith in yourself and to slip into behaviours and attitudes that you know are not beneficial. Something will always tempt you away from your goals, but you will always have a choice.

[GreenJellyFan]

"My Blood Before Me Begs Me Open up my Heart Again." I think this refers to him drawing blood from his vein, his addiction in his mind begging him to give into this way of life again. As sick as it may sound.

I read a direct maynard quote somwhere, i cannot remember where, about how the song is not about Heroin. Maynard wasn't even a junkie i don't think. Its about the Devil and the Angel, i know i heard him say that. And the Title H comes from him waking up in a Hospital bed. I know, i read it in a Rolling Stone from like 96-97

[Red Yehti]

I read a direct maynard quote somwhere, i cannot remember where, about how the song is not about Heroin. Maynard wasn't even a junkie i don't think. Its about the Devil and the Angel, i know i heard him say that. And the Title H comes from him waking up in a Hospital bed. I know, i read it in a Rolling Stone from like 96-97

Of course Maynard will not admit publicly ths song is about his Heroin adiction. The consequences of negative media campaing against the band are too intimidating. Just look what happened to "PULP FICTION"-- the critics slammed it because it displayed herion use in a positive way when Travolta was cruising in his car and smoking a cig in total bliss, just after shooting up heroin. As anyone who has been around heroin knows "H" is a slang term for the drug itself.

[djp4516]

Isn't that quote from what Maynard says before H at Woodstock 99?

[weathermantom]

yeah, but I've also heard that they were going to call the song either half-full or half-empty, and they couldnt decide which, so they just called it H.

[fretforyourfigure462]

I'm thinking he blood reference is his family, particularily his mother. The snake is his friends, his past dabbling in the dark arts. When you visit the lyrics to Jambi, H has a similar feel.




Interesting point.

[fretforyourfigure462]

"Considerately" can also mean "deliberately."

The snake could be looked at in two different ways: Either an evil tempter or a guide helping to trigger an awakening. When the snake tempted Eve with the apple, sure they got cast out of the garden of Eden, but they were also awakened with a new awareness about the free will that they posessed.

Maybe the song was written through the viewpoint of an aspect of Maynard's personality. Maybe an ego, or a part of him that he is struggling to control. It is a part of him that he takes comfort in, but that he knows is toxic. It drags him down. His blood before him (his mother?) begs him to open his heart, to get back on a certain path. In "Wings" so many of the lyrics indicate to me that she had a large role in helping Maynard find himself spiritually.

"Considerately killing me" might refer only to the death of this particular ego. It is considerate as in kind AND as in deliberate because he wants to be rid of it. It could also refer to the deliberate way in which his coddling of this ego is killing himself in a way. "Drains me, bleeds me, leaves me cracked and empty, drags me down like some sweet gravity."

"I am too connected to you to
Slip away, to fade away.
Days away I still feel you
Touching me, changing me,
And considerately killing me."

I think the above verse refers to both sides. Both the particular ego and the "angel" trying to help him (could be an outside person or his higher self - I'm leaning toward the latter). He is connected to both; He doesn't want to lose either one.

The path to self-discovery can be a very long, tedious path with many hurdles and setbacks. It is easy to lose faith in yourself and to slip into behaviours and attitudes that you know are not beneficial. Something will always tempt you away from your goals, but you will always have a choice.



Hmm I know I already posted, but I just had to say that is a very well thought out interpretation. I agree with all of that you said...but what makes it hard to come to a decision is all these different view points in the forum, and you combine them with your own thoughts...and you end up with one big jumble of an interpretation.
Oh well.
Regardless, the song is one of my favorites.