LeperKhan
04-25-2006, 12:32 AM
May 2nd comes, and there is no new album. At all. No b-side/fake album. No good album or fake album. Only the news that Tool has broken up. No interview is ever given explaning the breakup, and no officials connected to the band give a substantial answer...
SO, where does this leave us?
Prediction:
"Tool broke up because so many people stole their album.... the pirates have ruined music forever!"
"No, man... Tool broke up because so many people bashed a fucking awesome album.... I mean, if people could say such cruel things about a song like '10,000 Days' it must mean that there are too many asshole Tool fans out there... It was about his mother, dammit!"
"No, man, listen..... Tool broke up because they knew they had ridden this train as far as it could go... they wanted to go out with a bang. They had enough money to settle with Volcano abotu that last record, so there wasn't any real contractual obligation"
"No, you listen to ME..... they broke up because they knew Volcano was going to release their album, an album they had to make to satisfy their contract, and nothing more... and they're reforming any day now, free of Volcano's pressure."
"Tool didn't even break up. They're just releasing this info to screw with everybody.... the new album is being released in a couple of weeks, and everyone is going to look so stupid when that happens"
"GTFO"
"This breakup isn't the real breakup. The real breakup happens in 2010"
"Tool have broken up, people. Just accept it."
"Tool could never break up. You all need to stfu"
"Maynard's in a hospital right now. When he heard about how the songs devoted to him mother were panned, he fell into a emotional down-spiral and became suicidal. That's why Tool broke up"
"Tool broke up because Tool was just cool for Tool. I'm clever because I made a joke that rhymed and referenced something old-school."
"Tool broke up because they're fucking millionaires and they're fans are completely insane."
"Tool didn't break up. Gtfo"
"I have proof that Tool didn't break up"
"Can you back that up?"
"No"
And so on.
SO, where does this leave us?
Prediction:
"Tool broke up because so many people stole their album.... the pirates have ruined music forever!"
"No, man... Tool broke up because so many people bashed a fucking awesome album.... I mean, if people could say such cruel things about a song like '10,000 Days' it must mean that there are too many asshole Tool fans out there... It was about his mother, dammit!"
"No, man, listen..... Tool broke up because they knew they had ridden this train as far as it could go... they wanted to go out with a bang. They had enough money to settle with Volcano abotu that last record, so there wasn't any real contractual obligation"
"No, you listen to ME..... they broke up because they knew Volcano was going to release their album, an album they had to make to satisfy their contract, and nothing more... and they're reforming any day now, free of Volcano's pressure."
"Tool didn't even break up. They're just releasing this info to screw with everybody.... the new album is being released in a couple of weeks, and everyone is going to look so stupid when that happens"
"GTFO"
"This breakup isn't the real breakup. The real breakup happens in 2010"
"Tool have broken up, people. Just accept it."
"Tool could never break up. You all need to stfu"
"Maynard's in a hospital right now. When he heard about how the songs devoted to him mother were panned, he fell into a emotional down-spiral and became suicidal. That's why Tool broke up"
"Tool broke up because Tool was just cool for Tool. I'm clever because I made a joke that rhymed and referenced something old-school."
"Tool broke up because they're fucking millionaires and they're fans are completely insane."
"Tool didn't break up. Gtfo"
"I have proof that Tool didn't break up"
"Can you back that up?"
"No"
And so on.