So i went to my local record store...

[drastic]

As soon as I walk in I notice they have Rosetta Stoned BLASTING inside the store, I can't even think straight, then one of the employee's comes up to me and asks if I'd heard the new album (i was wearing a tool polo), I told him I'd pre-ordered it and asked if he knew anything about it. Basically here's the deal:

- There are 4 discs. The first 2 are the double album we've all been waiting for, then another disc is a 3 hour dvd special on the native american history behind the album, with the last disc actually being a floppy disk (?!) with all of Blair's news letters on it DECODED.

- The 6/6/6 release date is actually concerning a new bottle of wine Maynard's vineyard is releasing that has the secret release date of the live DVD written behind the label.!!

- Supposedly the US tour is a hoax. The UK tour will probably still happen, but the US tour dates will actually feature a Cirque De Solei show (probably O, but it's still up in the air).

From what I could tell the guy seemed credible.

[SomethingSpecial]

wtf? The album, as I understand it, has not been shipped yet. So how would some highschool dropout at your local Tower record store know about the new album (in regards to it being a 4 disc or a 666 disc album.)

Makes no sense. But thanks for stopping by.

[G-Dub4lyfe]

Sounds 100% credible.

[Lagomorph]

most plausible theory i have heard yet.

with sound evidence too.

[SomethingSpecial]

Sounds 100% credible.

WTF.

Best thread ever

[Sine Nobilitas]

I loled.

[FistFck]

um. limh. i guess.

[magnolia]

I'm Magnolia and I approve of this thread.

[researchtriangle]

lol . . . .

[visionary]

Is Maynard advocating alcohol consumption and a drunken trip through some Mayan ruins in search of his lost message?

[SomethingSpecial]

sound evidence? Some dude at a record store knows more about the new tool album than anyone on this forum (which doesn't say that much). Ok guys, here is what really is going on.

My friend told me that his friend was hanging out with Maynard the other day on his vineyard. And while he was sucking Maynards (6 inch) dick, he paused and gazed into 'Nards eyes and asked, "10,000 Days, WTF?". And Maynard said "IRL"? And dude says "Lol, yes IRL". And Maynard says, in between gagging sucks on his dick "6-6-06, 4 disc, + live dvd, oh yeah oh yeah"

From what I could tell the guy seemed credible.

[skizzott]

Sorry, but I don't believe it, especially the hidden date on maynard's wine. One, he'd never do that and second his bottles dont have labels!!!!! The info is printed right onto the bottle, so it's impossible to put something on the back...

[SomethingSpecial]

OOoooooh, Drastic got Moded

[SomethingSpecial]

Moded = early 90's version of pwned

[drastic]

Moded = early 90's version of pwned

.... are you serious?

[SomethingSpecial]

yeah. totally serious.

[SomethingSpecial]

you never heard of moded

[Hippo]

lolz

[sonicdescent]

ORLY??

[SomethingSpecial]

lolicakes. this thread died just like drastic's theory

[Staid]

OOoooooh, Drastic got Moded


lol good times, I haven't heard someone use "moded" in ages...


oooooooooo you got moded!

[paganman7]

I heard it was a 5 disk set, with the 5th disk being a home video of Blair tossing Axl Rose's salad at the Christmas dinner.

[LeperKhan]

This isn't the real humorous thread. The one's here just to throw us off. The real humorous thread is coming out May 2nd.



Also, I heard the new album comes with a free Ribwich(you obviously have to go to McDobald's to get the sandwich, though... lets not be unreasonable)

[chalk_line]

I heard it was a 5 disk set, with the 5th disk being a home video of Blair tossing Axl Rose's salad at the Christmas dinner.

damn, i thought the 5th disk was animal porn, now im dissapointed

[paganman7]

damn, i thought the 5th disk was animal porn, now im dissapointed



What's the difference between animal porn and watching Blair have sex?

[CallofCthulhu]

Thats the most ABSURD theory I've heard yet.

[chalk_line]

What's the difference between animal porn and watching Blair have sex?
not much i guess...

[LeperKhan]

What, you're saying there's a difference between animal sex and Blair having sex?

[Dungflowers]

4 dics?

Thats some tuna pussy shit.

I will not be happy unless it has 23 CDs that need to be played on 23 stereos that are hand operated by 23 silly monkeys that are high on pot.

Then and only then can the true Tool album be heard.

[LeperKhan]

Don't forget the blood of virgins. You alwasys forget the blood of virgins, and I'm telling you that you need the blood of virgins to really like Tool.

[magnolia]

you never heard of moded
... GIVE me a BREAK, COME ON.

[Nietzsche's Dead]

Sounds 100% credible.


my ass... lol. i was kinda considering it until you mentioned the fucking Cirque de Soleil shit lmao. And you almost lost me at the fucking "floppy disc..". Wow. I think either someone has too much time on their hands or they're very gullible ;)

[magnolia]

This isn't the real humorous thread. The one's here just to throw us off. The real humorous thread is coming out May 2nd.



Also, I heard the new album comes with a free Ribwich(you obviously have to go to McDobald's to get the sandwich, though... lets not be unreasonable)
I thought you had to mail-in for the Ribwich. I'll get a scan of the coupon in a few hours...

[Nietzsche's Dead]

ORLY??

LOL

[LeperKhan]

my ass... lol. i was kinda considering it until you mentioned the fucking Cirque de Soleil shit lmao. And you almost lost me at the fucking "floppy disc..". Wow. I think either someone has too much time on their hands or they're very gullible ;)


Dude, you were "kinda considering it" until the Soleil comment?


Hmm.

[homsniff]

Guys what we have now is the album.... nothing more.
Get OVER IT!!

[SomethingSpecial]

Oooooooooo, homsniff just moded himself

[LeperKhan]

Tooltaly pwoded.