Something i Sort of Wrote

[TragedysEyes]

Hey....i read this thing somewhere and sort of changed it and added to it and took from it....but here what came out....


I wish I could live in your tears,
Hopelessly drown in your rose petal sea.
And when the rain drops hit- we fall tumbling down into our own defeat and misery, painting with all my shades of red, to decorate an empty canvas, that will become a masterpiece of our own departing- And from the canvas it hits the wall. Becoming enviable just as you are to me-
and all that’s left is a lake of tears- that we will spend our time in, till memories have faded and left unjaded.
The pictures are blurry in shades of brown, from flames left unattended. Ashes only left, slowly drifting into an infinite wind.
I am broken.
So I’ll take this knife and push it hard against my chest, there is no use for you to spare your gun.
For your words have done enough damage. I’m feeling tired and exposed, consumed by obscurity and deceit.
My thoughts form a never-ending pattern, and for the time being, I can only guess what it’d feel like to be lost in your life of endless nights and sleepless tears.
Sorry for the havoc I wrecked upon your vitality,
I left the glass I shattered in your way, break yourself upon my tattered heart.

give me some feedback? i know the spacing and punctuation and all is kind of random and not good...but iwhenever i write its just a huge paragraph....anyways.... feel free to IM me at "ExpectingLess"

thank you
-Toolfreak

[Fire_line318]

ok is that your poem, or someone elses that you just took credit for? anyway's its pretty good, don't worry about the punctuation and what not, its not important. its a good poem, but if it isnt yours don't use it...

and i have a questin, does the fact about the "shade of brown" have any significance?

[TragedysEyes]

No, its mine, i read something and later wrote that, it has just simmilar lines as the one i read. But it is mine.

What do you mean about the shade of brown having significance?....It says the pictures are blurry in shades of brown, from flames left unattended....like when you burn pictures, eh not as deep as you were going for? haa
-toolfreak