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View Full Version : The Pot v. Hooker with a Penis v. Ticks and Leeches v. etc.


Viginti Tres
04-20-2006, 05:10 PM
I couldn't resist.....which one do you like best?

Hooker with a Penis gets my vote

Grimey
04-20-2006, 05:46 PM
Agree'd, these are all great tracks.

dracomordag
04-20-2006, 06:29 PM
wtf ticks and leeches FTW

Dr. Jake Destructo
04-20-2006, 08:28 PM
I went with Ticks and Leeches definitely. The Pot is great, but it doesn't have that same angst as the other four tracks.

lzep86
04-20-2006, 08:28 PM
Ticks and Leeches man. To ad injury to insult, the music just fucking wails. One of the most highly charged Tool songs.

Andy DV
04-20-2006, 09:18 PM
what an arbitrary list...im just confused. the pot is groovy, man...

Archetypically
04-20-2006, 09:30 PM
Hooker with a penis takes the cake

NateDaTater
04-20-2006, 09:33 PM
Ticks & Leeches is so intense he can't sing it live. Yeah, it wins.

Reflection
04-20-2006, 09:38 PM
"Tick & Leeches", "The Pot" close behind.

bigtard
04-20-2006, 09:44 PM
Ticks & Leeches is so intense he can't sing it live. Yeah, it wins.

What does that have to do with insults?

reverend resistor
04-20-2006, 09:52 PM
What does that have to do with insults?

From what I've heard, some record exec. told them that Lateralus lacked some "heavy" material, so they put that song on there just for him, all extra-special-nice like.

Read the lyrics now -- it will make a great deal more sense to you.

And I'm going with The Pot... Do not question me.

andrew7667
04-20-2006, 09:52 PM
HWAP.

I love the drum intro to Ticks and Leeches, but HWAP is much better.

drumtool
04-20-2006, 10:24 PM
the pot(maybe cause its new, time will tell.)
then hooker with a penis= with swamp thing(best undertow track)
jerkoff then ticks and leeches

Systolic
04-20-2006, 10:26 PM
The Pot is just a fun song in general.. I like it a lot.

mosvar
04-21-2006, 02:42 AM
W#hy was my post removed. Nothing like a little censorship

s ti N Kfizt
04-21-2006, 02:51 AM
The Pot

Oberon
04-21-2006, 02:54 AM
how can you POSSIBLY compare Pot and hooker? hooker actually ends as opposed to jsut stopping

s ti N Kfizt
04-21-2006, 03:09 AM
Hooker with a Penis = worst song on Aenima.
agreed.

i like it, but not so much. it's nostalgic. Ticks & Leeches = worst song on Lateralus.

wks49
04-21-2006, 05:15 AM
Hooker with a Penis = worst song on Aenima.

And it's still better than the pot.

Jerk Off owns all of those songs. Thats when maynard had testicles.

Scrotophagus
04-21-2006, 07:06 AM
agreed.

i like it, but not so much. it's nostalgic. Ticks & Leeches = worst song on Lateralus.

Agree

Rosette feasted
04-21-2006, 07:13 AM
agreed.

i like it, but not so much. it's nostalgic. Ticks & Leeches = worst song on Lateralus.
and still better than the majority of tenthousand days

s ti N Kfizt
04-21-2006, 07:20 AM
and still better than the majority of tenthousand days
every song on 10 000 Days is better than Ticks & Leeches.. well, i don't know about Vicarious..

i used to love Ticks, but now it's just a good song and Danny is amazing in it.

indelible inc.
04-21-2006, 07:22 AM
Hooker with a Penis FTW!

5th Eye
04-21-2006, 07:25 AM
Jerk-Off. I seem to be in the minority. (I also haven't heard The Pot, but screw that.)

xlc210
04-21-2006, 07:35 AM
You guys are freaking nuts -

Hooker is awesome - drums rule in that and Ticks, C'mon - worst songs on their respective albums - Well, maybe, but even the worst tool song rocks out!

guitarpete987
04-21-2006, 08:01 AM
Okay, maybe it's because I'm OGT, but Jerk-Off is the best fuck you song in tool's catalogue.

Have you listened to the lyrics and heard the intensity?

Someone told me once
that there's a right and wrong,
and that punishment
would come to those
who dare to cross the line.

But it must not be true
for a jerk-off just like you.
Maybe it takes longer to catch a total asshole.
but I'm tired of waiting.

Maybe it's just bullshit; I should play GOD,
and shoot you myself.
Tired of waiting.

Consequences dictate
our course of action
and it doesn't matter what's right.
It's only wrong if you get caught.
If consequences dictate
my course of action
I should play GOD
and just shoot you myself.
I'm tired of waiting.

Die now!

Shoot you,
kick you,
fuck you,
and then shoot you in your fucking head.

He's basically saying the guy is pathetic enough to be murdered. Immediately. Yeah, it gets my vote.

I likeThe Pot, though... I like it a lot. Just not the best insult song.

#Notion
04-21-2006, 12:00 PM
Well I'm holding out til May 2, and I'm not OGT or absolutely in love with ticks or hooker. Swamp song kicks ass

placidium
04-21-2006, 12:03 PM
the pot doesn't belong here, the pot has a deep emotional aspect hidden within.

and the music beats the hell out of Ticks and Jerk-Off and Swamp Song and Hooker.

Navid
04-21-2006, 02:10 PM
The Pot is good. Got great rhythm to it. But I don't think it can rival most of the others in terms of sheer "insult", for want of a better word.

Hooker with a Penis gets my vote.

Viginti Tres
04-21-2006, 03:16 PM
I'm too young to be OGT =/ i was 4 years old when Opiate came out

Jerk Off is an intense song, one of the original reasons i started getting into Tool...Still, I prefer Hooker with a Penis

Synergy
04-21-2006, 04:37 PM
The Pot, because he says Kangaroo. I mean really, how many times have you heard kangaroo in a song before?

praefector
04-21-2006, 04:46 PM
as much as i like hooker

the pot wins with this line:

"you must have been outcho mind"

soberfish
04-22-2006, 03:54 PM
as an INSULT Hooker w/a Penis takes the strongest jab

stardown
04-22-2006, 04:23 PM
Good God, that's a hell of a poll. All those songs are on my top list except the pot, which is decent, but not necessarily on the same level as the rest.

ladiatia
04-22-2006, 04:33 PM
Jerk Off, of course. SHOOT YOU MYSELF!!!

Salud!

slicknickshady
04-22-2006, 04:38 PM
Hooker with a Penis

smeefsmeef
05-31-2006, 03:41 PM
The Pot kicks

The-Patient
06-01-2006, 07:02 AM
My vote goes for hooker with a penis, love that distortion on mayanrd's voice, my second favourite is jerk off.

scar
06-01-2006, 07:18 AM
Hooker with a Penis = worst song on Aenima.


indeed

bitter_enigma
06-01-2006, 07:19 AM
Jerk off, for the sheer rawness.

flawlessme
06-01-2006, 07:49 AM
Jerk-Off!! "Shoot you in your fucking head"

smeefsmeef
06-01-2006, 11:07 PM
Jerk-Off is fun to "cover"

Thejoelsvolta
06-01-2006, 11:37 PM
Hooker with a penis is definately the best. The message is so clearly stated it deserves no interpretaton and I love the acknowledgement of the marketing game. In addition, I still have trouble figuring out just exactly what I am hearing during the middle breakdown part. The pot is awsome as well, but not as musically mysterious.

Unintelligible_Whispering
06-01-2006, 11:42 PM
the pot with ticks a close second

Luosdasa
06-02-2006, 07:03 PM
Only 20 other people have voted for Swamp Song!!
U bastards... *shakes fist*

nah, tis a pretty hard list to pick from... I could just as easily have voted for Jerk off or Ticks

diabz
06-02-2006, 07:24 PM
Okay, maybe it's because I'm OGT, but Jerk-Off is the best fuck you song in tool's catalogue.

also being OGT i agree wholeheartedly, Jerk-Off gets my vote.

But seriously, I met a boy pointing his finger who was a stupid beligerant fucker sucking me dry. why didn't he watch where he was wandering while riding a kangaroo? the kangaroo was stoned so i played "god" and shot him myself.

pjfan
06-02-2006, 08:14 PM
I think HWAP has the best "insult" value although The Pot is the best song per se mainly because of the vox.

rogerdoger
06-02-2006, 08:47 PM
Really hard to chose...I think Ticks and Leeches, but it would probably change depending on my mood.

rogerdoger
06-02-2006, 08:48 PM
I think HWAP has the best "insult" value although The Pot is the best song per se mainly because of the vox.
The Pot deffinatly has the best vocals, they're amazing.

Al911
06-03-2006, 12:28 PM
I like em all, but I'll have to go with The Pot.

UFOtofu
06-03-2006, 12:33 PM
I have to go with The Pot too. It's the newest one and I haven't run it into the ground yet. Ask me again in a year or two and I'll probably go back to T & L. But it's just too early to tell which will have the staying power for me.

OneIGoalie
06-03-2006, 12:38 PM
Swamp Song

Emericana
06-03-2006, 12:40 PM
"it doesnt matter what's right... it's only wrong if you get caught"....

that line alone is why i voted jerkoff i love it

nighthawk
06-03-2006, 12:49 PM
agreed.

i like it, but not so much. it's nostalgic. Ticks & Leeches = worst song on Lateralus.

Ticks & Leeches worst??? are you kidding me?? that song is fucking sex dude, i hope your choking!!

5th Eye
06-03-2006, 05:26 PM
At least Jerk-Off beat Swamp Song...probably one of the most generic and dull Tool songs.

Thejoelsvolta
06-03-2006, 06:37 PM
Ticks and Leeches is the worst tool song ever, way too drawn out and cluttered in a bad way. I like cluttered music, but T&L is just annoying.

Marshy
06-03-2006, 06:42 PM
Ticks and Leeches.
It's just angry.
And theres killer bass.

inSin
06-03-2006, 07:33 PM
The Pot 4 The Win

Cid
06-04-2006, 01:13 PM
the pot is horrible....hooker is a fucking million times better.

5th Eye
06-04-2006, 01:17 PM
I'd pretty much agree with that.

Omar Rodriguez-Mopez
06-04-2006, 01:21 PM
Hooker with a Penis is one of the first things I think about when I have to deal with one of the masses of retards in this country. The song just fits in with all of these kids trying to be hip and cool, only to have their ass handed to them from someone with an actual brain.

Ticks & Leeches is one of my favorite songs from Tool. But it doesn't really seem like an insult. It's more like fighting back against those "bloodsuckers" in this world.

The Pot, is not at all an insult song.

Swamp Song and Jerk-Off...I have not heard.

swampyfool
06-04-2006, 01:52 PM
I've got to give it to Swamp Song. That Chorus just kicks ass.

"This bog is thick and easy to get lost in
when you're a stupid, beligerant fucker.
This bog is thick and easy to get lost in
when you're a dumbass, beligerant fucker.
I hope it sucks you down!"

So harsh, yet so eloquent.

They're all great choices, though.

paper_head
06-07-2006, 09:44 PM
I am just not that crazy about the Pot like everyone else is. HWAP got my vote.

Luosdasa
06-10-2006, 09:15 PM
At least Jerk-Off beat Swamp Song...probably one of the most generic and dull Tool songs.

you, my good sir, have acheived top spot on my headbutt list

Luosdasa
06-10-2006, 09:16 PM
Swamp Song and Jerk-Off...I have not heard.

you serious? sooo deprived...

Finny
06-10-2006, 09:21 PM
yeah sorry but swamp song is fucking amazing! it gets my vote

static
06-11-2006, 03:44 PM
As far as being an "insult" track, Jerk-Off has the best lyrical impact, IMO.

macfreak
06-11-2006, 04:06 PM
The pot is superior to hooker with a penis in every single aspect...my god the ending is just awesome u must have been outcha miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind

jamesa
06-11-2006, 04:12 PM
Can't wait to hear The Pot live. Ticks and Jerk Off are great but I'm going to hold back with my winner until I hear the afore mentioned live. Hopefully sooner than later.

AguirreWrathOfTool
06-13-2006, 09:53 PM
The Pot:

-Best harmonic and melodic material (riffs, chords, melodies)
-Best composed (most sophisticated and effective development and exploration of its materials)
-Best lyrics
-Best Performed as an ensemble.




It's not even a contest. People, this is disappointing.

ENTROPY9
06-14-2006, 07:57 AM
I'd have to go with JerkOff. I mean a song that is so strong that they are forced to change the lyrics in concert???

smeefsmeef
06-14-2006, 06:42 PM
Only 20 other people have voted for Swamp Song!!
U bastards... *shakes fist*


Swamp song is too old. You might as well vote for "Erlking" by Schubert.

AguirreWrathOfTool
06-14-2006, 07:59 PM
On a side note, Erlkönig = one of the sickest songs ever

nafloot
06-16-2006, 02:01 PM
I think My all time favorite Tool song is the best one...Hooker with a Penis!

nafloot
06-16-2006, 02:03 PM
the pot is horrible....hooker is a fucking million times better.

Dude the pot's good if it's green and purple. HWAP my fav also!

Warartist
06-18-2006, 04:52 AM
Hooker with a Penis, Aenima is my favorite album of all, ever, so I have to go with that. Ticks n Leeches fucking rocks though.

mr. nikki jensen
06-18-2006, 07:23 AM
my vote goes to Swamp Song. F@#king nice to sing a long to.

swampyfool
06-18-2006, 08:47 AM
Hooker with a Penis = worst song on Aenima.
Even if this were true (and I concede nothing), it isn't saying much. It's like saying that somebody was the stupidest valedictorian in the history of MIT.

jack_without_sally
06-18-2006, 12:04 PM
im gonna have to go with hooker with a penis......ticks and leeches is by far the better song as a whole but as a insult type song HWAP gets my vote

thomasknight
06-23-2006, 06:08 PM
The Pot doesn't come close to these other tracks, if I was the victim of it I'd be thinking...wtf?

duncang
07-06-2006, 12:57 PM
Was almost a complete split between The Pot and Hooker With A Penis.

Voted Hooker.

anarcho-commie
07-06-2006, 02:17 PM
The Pot is the best. In my opinion, one of the best Tool songs ever written, maybe not lyrically, bu definately musically.

trickma
07-11-2006, 10:58 PM
Ticks&Leeches + Hooker are MUCH better then the pot, you people who voted for the pot should be ashamed.

trickma
07-11-2006, 10:59 PM
SHAME SHAME SHAME

white horse
07-12-2006, 12:13 AM
Ticks and Leeches is the most venomous

DON IOTAE
07-12-2006, 04:28 PM
I have not read all the posts, but I can't believe you fuckers didn't all vote for Jerk Off immediately. Just check out the lyrics. Jus...Just... Just check out the lyrics. K? thanx

conawayb
08-27-2006, 11:45 AM
"I sold my soul to make a record,"
dipshit and you bought one




So shut up and
Buy my new record


If I'm the fucking man than you're the fucking man as well so
you can point that fuckin finger up your ass


YOU JUST CAN'T TOP THIS

HWAP all the way

trickma
08-27-2006, 05:05 PM
fuck you buddy ;)

mike09
08-27-2006, 05:56 PM
"Swamp Song" is so underrated.

Hetfield823
08-28-2006, 04:39 AM
All are great songs, imo and Swamp Song is very underrated. I voted Ticks & Leeches but Hooker was a close second.

Ghostwriter
06-21-2007, 05:04 PM
The Pot has alot of style.... MAYNARD TIME!

Ghostwriter
06-21-2007, 05:04 PM
"Swamp Song" is so underrated.

definently; it did not get one vote as a favorite of all the Tool songs... : (

fatlittleparasite
06-22-2007, 01:52 PM
i think eulogy is the most bitter song in the tool catalog, but from your list i will vote for hooker. jerk off is epic, but it sounds more like a drunken tirade next to the genuine fuck the world hostility in hwap.

Usurper
07-28-2007, 05:46 AM
Undoubtly as insult - song i would go 4 Hooker. But the truth of the matter is that the Pot is way better as a song. 4 Ticks I'd like 2 comment on it's drumming at the end

emir7
09-22-2007, 05:21 PM
Ticks is wildly epic. The drumming, oh my... it tickles my soul.

Tool_Is_Sick
09-25-2007, 09:53 PM
"Fuck you buddy!" Hooker with a penis.

Matthew77
10-03-2007, 11:03 AM
Ticks & Leeches is so intense he can't sing it live. Yeah, it wins.

I have seen Ticks & Leeches live and it rocks, but my vote is Hooker with a Penis and then The Pot in second with Ticks third then swamp song and finally Jerk off

court jester
11-24-2007, 10:26 PM
Ticks and Leeches. Amazing song. Angry, direct and some of the best drumming I have ever heard.

court jester
11-25-2007, 10:11 AM
Ticks and Leeches seems too polished and sterilized to be the clear winner here... some kind of raw energy feels missing from the production of that song.

Interesting thought. I don't agree about the sterilized part but you raised some good questions about how to approach voting in this category. I would have to say approaching this from your perspective Hooker with a Penis would have to win out over the other two. It is the least polished. Although just about everything Tool creates is polished. I think you have to go back to Opiate to find that raw and un-polished vibe. Now that I think about it Opiate itself might be Tool's best insult song. Anyway I enjoyed your perspective. Peace.

orangeisgoood
11-25-2007, 11:22 AM
I have not read all the posts, but I can't believe you fuckers didn't all vote for Jerk Off immediately. Just check out the lyrics. Jus...Just... Just check out the lyrics. K? thanx

i have to agree. i think the pot is an overall "better" song, but jerk off is way more violent. (i still voted for the pot :P)

DON IOTAE
11-25-2007, 01:09 PM
Jerk off is sooooooooooooo in your face.

Jambi_the_Genie
11-25-2007, 03:13 PM
HWAP gets my vote...


If i got insulted with lyrics from The Pot, id be like wtf?!?


Swamp Song is pretty Underrated, but yeah, i dont really see that as an insulting, as much as a song that is warning you, you know...


Jerk-Off is pretty much in the middle with HWAP for me... but IMO, HWAP is more in your face, and has more thought inflicted into it...


Ticks and Leeches is an amazing song, better than all of the others... but i like that song musically than lyrically...


But the only reason i chose Hooker... is because i TOTALLY agree with what maynard is singing... and i hope the rest of you do as well...

orangeisgoood
11-26-2007, 04:15 PM
but I voted for the Pot, because it just has that energy that... kinda moves along, I would say, it feels like that song is going somewhere. Making progress towards revenge.

and it talks about kangaroos! how could you not vote for a song that talks about kangaroos!

orangeisgoood
11-26-2007, 04:26 PM
yeah ik.
but that guy that keeps pissing all over my black kettle is really starting to piss me off..
i cant get the god damn rust off it now...

orangeisgoood
11-26-2007, 04:35 PM
well it better be cozened.... or else its just no good!

fume
11-28-2007, 04:43 PM
Hooker w/ a Penis
Buy my new record
FUUUUUCK you buddy

Rolo
03-22-2008, 08:01 PM
Ticks and Leeches without question. Everything about the song is angry. It doesn't have the "fuck you buddy"....but it has one very pissed off "I hope you choke on this" that works just as well. And the drumming...pure genius.

^supported^

I can totally relate to this.