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View Full Version : the truth about the new album

KZSteele
03-16-2006, 07:18 PM
what is really going to happen is that it's going to be packaged normally, but when you open it you find:

1) a blank cd
2) a note

the note will read:

"Dear Fan -

Thank you for your twelve dollars and ninety-nine cents. We know you worked hard earning it. The truth is that there -is- no new album. The real Tool album is within -you-. With four albums produced since 1991 and an average wait period of four-and-half to five years between releases, you have had plenty of time to imagine what the fifth album will sound like. Now sit back, relax, and press the play button of your mind.

Oh, and regarding the blank CD: Burn nine to ten of your favorite Tool songs onto it. You know, the ones you downloaded from the internet. Make sure it's packed full, too. That way you are sure to get every bit of your twelve dollars and ninety-nine cents' worth from this CD.

Yours Always,

TOOL"
Ocelot199
03-16-2006, 07:20 PM
I posted something like this a while ago.

It was funny then, and its funny now.
SpiralOutKeepGoing
03-16-2006, 07:22 PM
Only 9 to 10 favorite Tool tracks? come on now. I want it to have 2 blank discs.
hobophobe
03-16-2006, 07:25 PM
It's been done. Sir Millard Mulch's "How to Sell the Whole Fucking Universe to Everybody Once and For All" is a "three disc" album, but the third disc is a clear piece of plastic in the shape of a cd (the kind some cd-r bundles come with on the ends to protect them).

Of course, Millard failed to include a note about Tool in his album....
amitface
03-16-2006, 07:26 PM
Maybe they'll have a Lateralus type sleeve that says 10,000 days on it. And then when you open it, the actual title will be on the booklet... this probably won't happen, but at least I didn't start a thread about it. Thought I'd throw it in here.
Ocelot199
03-16-2006, 07:30 PM
It's been done. Sir Millard Mulch's "How to Sell the Whole Fucking Universe to Everybody Once and For All" is a "three disc" album, but the third disc is a clear piece of plastic in the shape of a cd (the kind some cd-r bundles come with on the ends to protect them).

Of course, Millard failed to include a note about Tool in his album....
What is this, now? Sounds interesting...

It'd be funny if it was packaged in some awsome new artwork, and the single was totally the shit, and then you buy the CD, check out the awsome picture on it, pop it in your player and it turns out to be Disturbed.

Edit: Oh wait, even better: Its Tool, but the entire album is a cover of 10,000 Fists. Oh man that would be funny.
KZSteele
03-16-2006, 07:33 PM
Ummm bin/ban?

omfg lol... you can't be serious.

Notion Seconded

and neither can -you-.

i think i hurt some feelings. oops. it isn't like you can't laugh at that. does www.sendmeadollar.com sound familiar to anyone here? thx.

btw - check my e-bay auction for clearance deals on kleenex.. only if you need a new supply and all.
dracomordag
03-16-2006, 07:37 PM
omfg lol... you can't be serious.



and neither can -you-.

i think i hurt some feelings. oops. it isn't like you can't laugh at that. does www.sendmeadollar.com sound familiar to anyone here? thx.

btw - check my e-bay auction for clearance deals on kleenex.. only if you need a new supply and all.

i lol'd at this entire thread not