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View Full Version : A VERY PERTINANT (pile of crap I just laid)


a big stupid dumbass
03-09-2006, 09:31 PM
Hello all you big fucking tools,

This is a rumor that I heard the other day. Some (just a few) fans of the band that this website has been structured for have developed a severe form or megalomaniacal fanaticism. (whagh?? you say...I know, I had a hard time believing it myself untill I saw it with my own eyes) I have a slight inclination to say that these (just a few) fans might spoil the chance for a certain new CD to help them because they are so overwhelmed with the painful (you know it hurts) realization that, well, they really don't have much going on in their lives save for their ever growing enthusia for an intentional mysteria machine.

Take BMB's advice. Please. Don't go out and buy this CD and listen to it over and over again untill you have the urge to slap you meager consciousness back over to toolband.com and wait ever so impaitiently for the next tool cd to come out. Yeah maybe listen to a couple tracks upon purchasing, but save for those, damn it. Save it up and then 2 or 3 years down the road, after you have wisely spent your time in more rewarding endevors like reading WORTHWHILE text and meditating on WORTHWHILE issues, you will still have some nuggets of what used to be a post-adolescent catharsis machine left to soak in. Who knows, maybe you will be so enthralled in what you are currently doing, you might even forget about what used to steal your attentional spotlight day after day and night after recalcitrant night.

So I am posting in order to confirm the rumor. It is true. Y'all are just silly.

Maybe a logical equation will make due for your left brain...

"Listen to Tool all the time and do something for yourself because your sad."

If A = Listen to Tool all the time

and

B = do something for yourself because your sad

we should revise our equation to assimilate the new rumor into it, cause you know it is just so important that we have all the facts so that we can be up to date with our doxastic cleansing.

So in doing this we will end up with....

~A & B

Maybe a right brain excersise will hammer it home...

wow, that feeling was deep man, I think I got in touch with the creative energy of the universe dude, I like can't even put it into words...but...whoa...I just put into words my feeling that I cannot put my feeling into words. We should go buy some tool shirts and wear them for 10,000 days, maybe then we can be mystics

HAPPY TRAILS YOU SORRY FANS OUT THERE
TRY NOT TO BITE YOUR TOUNGE WHILE IT IS HANGING OUT IN AWE OF THIS COMPLETELY AMAZING ENCAPTUALISATION OF YOUR ETERNAL LABRYNTH OF ERROR
DO NOT FORGET TO


buy

Ryan
03-09-2006, 09:33 PM
k.

McRoggles
03-09-2006, 09:35 PM
What did he say?

Sine Nobilitas
03-09-2006, 09:38 PM
Thank you for that steaming dump you just laid.

What a pile of shit.

Mya
03-09-2006, 09:39 PM
Hello all you big fucking tools,

This is a rumor that I heard the other day. Some (just a few) fans of the band that this website has been structured for have developed a severe form or megalomaniacal fanaticism. (whagh?? you say...I know, I had a hard time believing it myself untill I saw it with my own eyes) I have a slight inclination to say that these (just a few) fans might spoil the chance for a certain new CD to help them because they are so overwhelmed with the painful (you know it hurts) realization that, well, they really don't have much going on in their lives save for their ever growing enthusia for an intentional mysteria machine.

Take BMB's advice. Please. Don't go out and buy this CD and listen to it over and over again untill you have the urge to slap you meager consciousness back over to toolband.com and wait ever so impaitiently for the next tool cd to come out. Yeah maybe listen to a couple tracks upon purchasing, but save for those, damn it. Save it up and then 2 or 3 years down the road, after you have wisely spent your time in more rewarding endevors like reading WORTHWHILE text and meditating on WORTHWHILE issues, you will still have some nuggets of what used to be a post-adolescent catharsis machine left to soak in. Who knows, maybe you will be so enthralled in what you are currently doing, you might even forget about what used to steal your attentional spotlight day after day and night after recalcitrant night.

So I am posting in order to confirm the rumor. It is true. Y'all are just silly.

Maybe a logical equation will make due for your left brain...

"Listen to Tool all the time and do something for yourself because your sad."

If A = Listen to Tool all the time

and

B = do something for yourself because your sad

we should revise our equation to assimilate the new rumor into it, cause you know it is just so important that we have all the facts so that we can be up to date with our doxastic cleansing.

So in doing this we will end up with....

~A & B

Maybe a right brain excersise will hammer it home...

wow, that feeling was deep man, I think I got in touch with the creative energy of the universe dude, I like can't even put it into words...but...whoa...I just put into words my feeling that I cannot put my feeling into words. We should go buy some tool shirts and wear them for 10,000 days, maybe then we can be mystics

HAPPY TRAILS YOU SORRY FANS OUT THERE
TRY NOT TO BITE YOUR TOUNGE WHILE IT IS HANGING OUT IN AWE OF THIS COMPLETELY AMAZING ENCAPTUALISATION OF YOUR ETERNAL LABRYNTH OF ERROR
DO NOT FORGET TO


buy

typing that post would have taken a lot of effort.....
but lets not forget that this IS a tool forum... so you get your good with your bad..
*shrugs*
ignore it...

a788
03-09-2006, 09:41 PM
i just wasted my life reading the first few sentences of that post.... thank you.

Wretched
03-09-2006, 09:43 PM
I'd rather shit a boat again then read that, again.

fortysix_and_tool
03-09-2006, 09:46 PM
Hello all you big fucking tools,

edit: blah, blah, blah...

You had me at "hello". Then, lost me at "all".

Smells like...bin.

just simulacra
03-09-2006, 09:46 PM
Who wastes their first post on something that pretentious and boring?

Oh, that's right, every new god damned member these days.

Wretched
03-09-2006, 09:47 PM
Who wastes their first post on something that pretentious and boring?

Oh, that's right, every new god damned member these days.

A Big Stupid Dumbass does.

a788
03-09-2006, 09:48 PM
^lol

Winner
03-09-2006, 09:51 PM
i cant understand his gibberish...

...my head hurts now...

spiralout987
03-09-2006, 09:52 PM
It's funny b/c the time it took for him to write that he could have been doing something a little better with his time...

Like I said, give me a release date and titles, and I will never come to this site again...

no offense to everyone

Wretched
03-09-2006, 09:54 PM
It's funny b/c the time it took for him to write that he could have been doing something a little better with his time...

Like I said, give me a release date and titles, and I will never come to this site again...

no offense to everyone

You also could have done something better with your time then tell us this. None the less, I could have too, and on the cycle goes....

On the road again...

Ocelot199
03-09-2006, 09:56 PM
I read the first paragraph, and stopped.

I love thinking that hes probably sitting there in his boxers jerking off hitting refresh over and over to see if anybody agrees with him or has responded.

Its even funnier that almost none of us bothered to read it.

::laughs::

Winner
03-09-2006, 10:02 PM
none of us read it because we couldnt decipher it

Ocelot199
03-09-2006, 10:07 PM
none of us read it because we couldnt decipher it and don't give a shit anyway because hes a fucking douche
fixed

Riff
03-09-2006, 10:10 PM
I read it, and now I'm ghey.

a788
03-09-2006, 10:16 PM
really? it did that to you?

flipmojo
03-09-2006, 10:17 PM
I have to admit. You guys cracked me up in response to this thread.

Thank you for that steaming dump you just laid.

I'd rather shit a boat again then read that, again.

LOL! What a horrible first post.

Dharma Bear
03-09-2006, 10:23 PM
LOL! What a horrible first post.

Its not ment to be a good post. This is just someone being an ass because they think its funny. My guess is that its a normal user who probably got made fun of one too many times here, so he made a new name for the soul purpose of making this post. Just a theory is all...

LoKi
03-09-2006, 10:24 PM
lol.

KungFuGenius
03-09-2006, 10:24 PM
Who wastes their first post on something that pretentious and boring?

Oh, that's right, every new god damned member these days.
I'm still working on my stupid and pointless topic...just you wait...*shakes fist*

a788
03-09-2006, 10:26 PM
when you say *shakes fists* i picture an old wrinkly man who just got ripped off by someone and is too old to fight back... with some odd bitter expression on his face

thank you for that, it made me laugh

Ocelot199
03-09-2006, 10:29 PM
To whichever mod moved this thread and renamed it (prolly flux), I would like you to know that I am totally in love with you and am prepared to die if need be.

SadSummerSea
03-09-2006, 10:31 PM
well sorry to crush your **** hopes, but it was me!

edit: jesus. pwnd by the forum.

a788
03-09-2006, 10:31 PM
that was bold... i respect you for you bold statement. and if need be, i am prepared to die as well because of your bawdy statement

TurdEye13
03-09-2006, 10:34 PM
I'll listen to it 10 times on the release date just to spite you!

Sine Nobilitas
03-09-2006, 10:36 PM
when you say *shakes fists* i picture an old wrinkly man who just got ripped off by someone and is too old to fight back... with some odd bitter expression on his face

thank you for that, it made me laugh

whoops, yeah thanks just spit water all over my computer

LOL!

Ocelot199
03-09-2006, 10:39 PM
well sorry to crush your **** hopes, but it was me!

edit: jesus. pwnd by the forum.
damn.....

jhnygsh
03-09-2006, 10:52 PM
most, but not all, of you douche bags were 10 or 12 when aenima came out. why does it seem all of these kids think they are experts on tool? what grabs my goat is that none of you, nor i, understands why the CD is called 10k days, nor do we know if they are fucking with us. its fun to speculate about the album and thats why i browse this form, at least recently. after the album comes out ill fade away again until there is information to seek 5 years from now. but please, cut all the animosity... especially towards the new people. Maybe the guy who wrote the first post is tired of search these threads for information but keeps turning up idiotic bashing; just because someone wants to post an opinion. maybe they even made the mistake of stating something already said and will then be made fun of. perhaps they just cant sift through every post like some of you lames. im pretty disgusted to be associated with some of you simply because we are so fond of the same band.

mike tyson
03-09-2006, 10:54 PM
Hello all you big fucking tools,

This is a rumor that I heard the other day. Some (just a few) fans of the band that this website has been structured for have developed a severe form or megalomaniacal fanaticism. (whagh?? you say...I know, I had a hard time believing it myself untill I saw it with my own eyes) I have a slight inclination to say that these (just a few) fans might spoil the chance for a certain new CD to help them because they are so overwhelmed with the painful (you know it hurts) realization that, well, they really don't have much going on in their lives save for their ever growing enthusia for an intentional mysteria machine.

Take BMB's advice. Please. Don't go out and buy this CD and listen to it over and over again untill you have the urge to slap you meager consciousness back over to toolband.com and wait ever so impaitiently for the next tool cd to come out. Yeah maybe listen to a couple tracks upon purchasing, but save for those, damn it. Save it up and then 2 or 3 years down the road, after you have wisely spent your time in more rewarding endevors like reading WORTHWHILE text and meditating on WORTHWHILE issues, you will still have some nuggets of what used to be a post-adolescent catharsis machine left to soak in. Who knows, maybe you will be so enthralled in what you are currently doing, you might even forget about what used to steal your attentional spotlight day after day and night after recalcitrant night.

So I am posting in order to confirm the rumor. It is true. Y'all are just silly.

Maybe a logical equation will make due for your left brain...

"Listen to Tool all the time and do something for yourself because your sad."

If A = Listen to Tool all the time

and

B = do something for yourself because your sad

we should revise our equation to assimilate the new rumor into it, cause you know it is just so important that we have all the facts so that we can be up to date with our doxastic cleansing.

So in doing this we will end up with....

~A & B

Maybe a right brain excersise will hammer it home...

wow, that feeling was deep man, I think I got in touch with the creative energy of the universe dude, I like can't even put it into words...but...whoa...I just put into words my feeling that I cannot put my feeling into words. We should go buy some tool shirts and wear them for 10,000 days, maybe then we can be mystics

HAPPY TRAILS YOU SORRY FANS OUT THERE
TRY NOT TO BITE YOUR TOUNGE WHILE IT IS HANGING OUT IN AWE OF THIS COMPLETELY AMAZING ENCAPTUALISATION OF YOUR ETERNAL LABRYNTH OF ERROR
DO NOT FORGET TO


buy

You sure live up to your username.

noisetherapy
03-09-2006, 10:59 PM
man just cause nickelback canceled your show doesnt mean you have to come here and think your cooler than us

Dharma Bear
03-09-2006, 10:59 PM
You sure live up to your username.

Thats the point. He wouldn't have used that name if he was going to say something serious.

mike tyson
03-09-2006, 11:00 PM
Thats the point. He wouldn't have used that name if he was going to say something serious.

Is your name Dharma?

Are you a bear?

researchtriangle
03-09-2006, 11:08 PM
am i just stoned or did that all make no sense

Dharma Bear
03-09-2006, 11:10 PM
Is your name Dharma?

Are you a bear?

The point I was making is....this is probably the only post this guy is going to make under this name. He made that name just to be an ass. If we were to see another post buy this person, it would just be more shit talking, hence the point of the name. This is just trolling in my opinion.

And to answer your question....no, im not a bear. The idea of a bear typing away on a computer is silly, but perhaps not impossible if given a giant keyboard. I mean....they can drive little cars, so maybe a net surfing Bear isn't so far fetched.

McRoggles
03-09-2006, 11:15 PM
I think a bear with a laptop is funny.

a big stupid dumbass
03-09-2006, 11:37 PM
I was at this nails concert the other night and I just roamed the lobby looking around at the different types of people (not many different types) that were present for the show. I started to realize that I was completely out of place and really didn't know why. I really don't want to do this, but I think I should probably explain the context out of which the initial post came from so that you quick responders out their won't have trouble sleeping tonight. I honestly do like music and was fairly excited about music when I first got into the band tool. I think I was 12 or something ridiculous like that. I am 22 now, deeply entrenched within psychology and philosophy and preparing to start graduate work. I am upset, registered and posted the pile of crap, and gave myself the moniker 'a big stupid dumbass' because it is all very apt. I apologize if the thread is too naive for your tastes. I realize that there are a serious amount of people, myself included, that take all of this stuff having to do with this band way out of proportion. Yeah the music is great, the creative energy brimming, and the ideas enveloping the sound are ground breaking within a musical context, but the arena in which this is all taking place is highly suspect. The music that you will hear in a couple of months is not going to save you from having to care for your parents when they are dying in front of your eyes. It will not cure the ailments which will most likely kill you. And it certainly will not help you to find new avenues for your life if you are increasingly focused on only it.
I have learned alot about how little I know about the world. I am still a big stupid dumbass and I am very quick to admit that. If it ever comes to the point where I stop thinking that, then I would rather not be here. Tool helped me bridge my attention toward other lines of thought that I am very greatful to have glimpsed, but they also turned me into a drooling idiot that asks how high to jump. I know that I am probably not the only one that has troubles dealing with these attentional fixations so I thought that I would post the pile of crap to help pull others, as well as myself, out of the muck. It didn't work. I'll gaze in awe at the new album reviews that will be coming out soon and probably listen to the album 10 times the first day that I buy it. I thought that I might tear away from this madness and be able to bring others along as well, but it will end within a hypocritical puff from a fog machine. We can still try though. Sorry if I am just scratching at your last nerve, but I am serious about being here in this world and trying to place myself as well as you within the best environment possible. Sometimes selflessness and a bit of scolding is the ticket, obviously this time it was not.

McRoggles
03-09-2006, 11:40 PM
Your posts are too long, break them up in small sections.

Ocelot199
03-09-2006, 11:40 PM
Another golden turd from out favorite new champ!

I got lost going line to line. Use periods and spaces between sentences and paragraphs. Makes it less annoying.

LoKi
03-09-2006, 11:44 PM
I think a bear with a laptop is funny.


especially a ninja bear who won't screw to save it's own species.

jhnygsh
03-10-2006, 12:21 AM
stop complaining you little shit. he is being open to us.

i enjoyed your post

LoKi
03-10-2006, 01:53 AM
this dude was open to us and came out of the closet so we puched him in the head LOL

Tyson
03-10-2006, 01:58 AM
I don't really listen to tool that much, if at all.

FAIL.

bo bo
03-10-2006, 02:21 AM
I was at this nails concert the other night and I just roamed the lobby looking around at the different types of people (not many different types) that were present for the show. I started to realize that I was completely out of place and really didn't know why. I really don't want to do this, but I think I should probably explain the context out of which the initial post came from so that you quick responders out their won't have trouble sleeping tonight. I honestly do like music and was fairly excited about music when I first got into the band tool. I think I was 12 or something ridiculous like that. I am 22 now, deeply entrenched within psychology and philosophy and preparing to start graduate work. I am upset, registered and posted the pile of crap, and gave myself the moniker 'a big stupid dumbass' because it is all very apt. I apologize if the thread is too naive for your tastes. I realize that there are a serious amount of people, myself included, that take all of this stuff having to do with this band way out of proportion. Yeah the music is great, the creative energy brimming, and the ideas enveloping the sound are ground breaking within a musical context, but the arena in which this is all taking place is highly suspect. The music that you will hear in a couple of months is not going to save you from having to care for your parents when they are dying in front of your eyes. It will not cure the ailments which will most likely kill you. And it certainly will not help you to find new avenues for your life if you are increasingly focused on only it.
I have learned alot about how little I know about the world. I am still a big stupid dumbass and I am very quick to admit that. If it ever comes to the point where I stop thinking that, then I would rather not be here. Tool helped me bridge my attention toward other lines of thought that I am very greatful to have glimpsed, but they also turned me into a drooling idiot that asks how high to jump. I know that I am probably not the only one that has troubles dealing with these attentional fixations so I thought that I would post the pile of crap to help pull others, as well as myself, out of the muck. It didn't work. I'll gaze in awe at the new album reviews that will be coming out soon and probably listen to the album 10 times the first day that I buy it. I thought that I might tear away from this madness and be able to bring others along as well, but it will end within a hypocritical puff from a fog machine. We can still try though. Sorry if I am just scratching at your last nerve, but I am serious about being here in this world and trying to place myself as well as you within the best environment possible. Sometimes selflessness and a bit of scolding is the ticket, obviously this time it was not.

I like these, long, trying to show everyone that I am a good writer, posts.

circulus
03-10-2006, 03:19 AM
I was at this nails concert the other night and I just roamed the lobby looking around at the different types of people (not many different types) that were present for the show. I started to realize that I was completely out of place and really didn't know why. I really don't want to do this, but I think I ....

TLDR.

The point I was making is....this is probably the only post this guy is going to make under this name.
...


I agree.

/V\agina
03-10-2006, 05:25 AM
I believe Sir Arthur Conan Doyle summed it all up back in the 18th century when he was quoted as saying:


"balls" ~Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

insaner
03-10-2006, 07:18 AM
I was at this nails concert the other night and I just roamed the lobby looking around at the different types of people (not many different types) /snizzipped.


i appreciate that youre now a college student and have gained some enlightenment from your studies, and you have learned to at least admit what you say isnt the law and call yourself a dumbass. but you do so in the context of preaching, so you really are just hiding behind a cute little method you discovered from aristotle. give yourself ten years more, and maybe you will understand what the man meant when he said he was smart enough to admit what he doesnt know.


and please, from your mystic high chair, do tell us what the WORTHWHILE TEXTS are....

mike tyson
03-10-2006, 08:15 AM
The point I was making is....this is probably the only post this guy is going to make under this name. He made that name just to be an ass. If we were to see another post buy this person, it would just be more shit talking, hence the point of the name. This is just trolling in my opinion.

And to answer your question....no, im not a bear. The idea of a bear typing away on a computer is silly, but perhaps not impossible if given a giant keyboard. I mean....they can drive little cars, so maybe a net surfing Bear isn't so far fetched.

lol you were wrong

Dharma Bear
03-10-2006, 08:46 AM
[QUOTE=mike tyson]lol you were wrong[/QUOTE

OMG lol!!!11.......But anyways, yes I was wrong, he made another post. But I was right about something, I said that if he were to make another post, it would just be more shit....and it was.

Silver Star is better then no star. :)

lachrymoIogy
03-10-2006, 02:00 PM
i love that this thread is like 48 posts of noob thrashing. ::squirt::

EulogyCallinMe
03-10-2006, 02:14 PM
And to answer your question....no, im not a bear. The idea of a bear typing away on a computer is silly, but perhaps not impossible if given a giant keyboard. I mean....they can drive little cars, so maybe a net surfing Bear isn't so far fetched.

hahahahaha. im at work and just laughed out really loudly and got a few odd looks as a result, but it was worth it.

dracomordag
03-10-2006, 03:30 PM
Like you can suggest that we don't experience the album as a whole

worst idea ever.


although I will try my best not to kill the album by listening to it 2000 times the first week.

Sol Invictus
03-10-2006, 03:32 PM
worst section ever and initial post ever.

a big stupid dumbass
05-01-2006, 01:55 PM
worst section ever and initial post ever.

I'm gonna have to go ahead and apologize for this one, I was up late one night and I was looking through some of the shit on this forum, and I just went off. It was completely spontaneous and it won't happen again. Even more, there were some ridiculous typos in it and I'm not sure people understand symbolic logic. I've spent some time making up for it by trying to post good threads and messages only. Once again, If anyone has gotton this far in the thread, I'm sorry for the universal flame. Now that I understand that this forum isn't all bad, and alot of good things can come from it and the people here, please forgive me.